I tested this morning with high hopes, AF still hadn't shown. It was negative but i was still okay, after all nothings over till AF shows. Two hours later she came and I spent the rest of the day on the couch crying. I wish I lived somewhere where I had more choices of doctors. Mine doesn't seem to do anything. I hear other people going for ultrasounds and testing the thickness of their lining. My doctor's plan is "take your clomid and call us when you O". I think I need more, but more is expensive and I only have enough left in the fund for 3 more IUIs. There's just not the thousands for specialists. I wonder how expensive injectables are. I thik my insurance would pay for ultrasounds, after all an ultrasound could be for anything, it doesn't neccesarily fall under infertility treatment - which they don't cover. Mybe I'll call Portland Reproductive and ask what they charge for a consult. It might be worth a drive over the mountain, if I can come up with the money.
I'm feeling really sad, and I'm trying really hard not to fall into the "no hope" trap though it's calling pretty loudly right now.
2 comments:
I'm so sorry >:o(
I know how hard the BFNs are. I try (it is very hard but I try) to think of it like "Well, at least I had a chance this month and I can have another chance. It's better than no chance at all". Of course it doesn't stop the tears but it DOES make it a little better after that first day of hell.
I hate what you're feeling today. CD 1 is such a bitter pill.
Lots of hugs to ease the pain from all of us!
Awww, sweetie. (((HUGS))) Those BFNs suck and it doesn't matter how many you've had...they all hurt. Things will work out sweetie! They will. You'll have your baby real soon and we'll all be cheering! Until then, we're still cheering for you and will always been here for support!
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